Why Finding Nemo Sucks

Finding Nemo is a kids tale of a clown fish named Marlin who loses his son, Nemo, in the Great Barrier Reef. The scenery may be colourful and our fishy characters may be cute, but this will not make us forget how stupid Nemo was in the first place.

In the beginning, Nemo doesn’t listen to his father and tries being a daredevil. He eventually goes so far away that a scuba diver scoops him up. If Nemo only listened, this treacherous journey wouldn’t have happened. Even more, his dad wouldn’t have died trying to rescue him in the process!


Basically, Marlin is a hero, and Nemo needs to be spanked severely.

At least it teaches kids a lesson. But we certainly wouldn’t recommend letting kids watch this for various scientific reasons:
  • Bruce and the other sharks wouldn’t wait so long to eat a fish, they would immediately kill Marlin and his friend.
  • The friendly pelican Nigel who tries to help the fish escape, wouldn’t really help them. He’d eat them! A pelicans diet is fish. And neither do pelicans have nostrils. 
  • Crush the sea turtle claims he’s 150 years old “and still young” but at 150, Crush would be almost twice the normal lifespan of a sea turtle, which is about 80 years.
  • We never see the fishes have a toilet.
Even though Marlin is a hero, he’s an idiot, especially at the end.

Nemo leaves for school once more and Marlin is no longer overprotective or doubtful of his son's safety like he was and watches Nemo swim away into the distance. Now why the Hell would Marlin be alright with Nemo swimming off now? Nemo nearly died!

Finding Nemo? We’ll leave Nemo for Bruce.

"You've been a bad boy Nemo..."
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1 comments:

  1. I am disapointed by this review. I think there are better reasons for this movie sucking and you chose the worst bad reasons to say the movie sucks.

    ReplyDelete

Thanks for commenting. Now go and watch some sucky films ;)